Heather Palmer Photography- Passion Project

I just didn’t have the right words for this post. I knew my words weren’t enough and I knew Kari’s would be. So I asked Kari to write up something to post. She hit it out of the park! We had actually tried to do this photos twice- and then tragedy struck both times. To say I was beyond honored to take their photos is an understatement. But don’t take it from me- read Kari’s words below.

I’m going to start by throwing this way back to fall of 2018. Around that time, Heather took family pictures of me (Kari), my husband Aaron, my mom Kim, my sister Kassie, and my dad Paul. These are the only professional family pictures we ever had taken of the five of us. They were (and still are) perfect. They’re pictures we’ll cherish forever. Especially now that our family has changed in ways we couldn’t have ever predicted. Here’s why…

In April of 2019, my daughter Sloan was born. She hit the world in the most meteorite-like fashion, needing to be immediately life flighted to Primary Children’s Hospital upon birth after a traumatic, life-threatening start to babyhood. In the months following her birth, Sloan was diagnosed with a syndrome called CHARGE. Among a long list of medical complexities, Sloan has a lifelong disability of profound DeafBlindness. This was a tough diagnosis and moment for our family, but we continued forward as our forever-tight family unit always did.

Five months later in September of 2019, my beautiful, kind, open-hearted mom and Sloan’s biggest advocate, grandma, and full-time-snuggler died unexpectedly in her sleep. We were overwhelmed, shocked, and distraught with grief. We were simply working on picking up the pieces from that. Then, in June of 2020, my dear husband and dedicated, strong dad to Sloan – Aaron – died by suicide after facing complex mental health diagnoses. He, like my mom, was also kind, dynamic, and open-hearted. We lost two of the nearest and dearest humans to our family, while continuing to face a long journey ahead with Sloan.

At this point, our world felt like it shifted in big ways: and we’d never quite get it back. Fast forward to October of 2020: after all of these major life moments. All I (Kari) still wanted was to simply get beautiful pictures: honoring my mom, Aaron, and Sloan.

Here’s the thing about grief, loss, and moments that aren’t so-picture-perfect: there’s a tendency to avoid facing or documenting those moments. Sometimes they’re avoided for privacy, and sometimes they’re avoided because they can simply be difficult and uncomfortable to face. But – instead of shying away from the uncomfortable – Heather showed up, camera in hand, smiling. She was ready to cry, laugh, and sit with us in that tough moment in time. Heather dedicated her expertise and time to making sure we had our pictures.

And, in a less-than-picture-perfect scenario, Heather took the most beautiful, perfect, honoring pictures of our unusual, sad-happy, forever-changed family. Heather planned and took pictures of all of us holding the photos of my mom and Aaron: fully honoring and loving both of them. And, combined with that, Heather waited SO patiently as we took the perfect pictures of our queen Sloan – a baby who has a wild personality, her own way of doing things, and can’t see or hear cues for pictures like most babies: so it takes a lot of patience and skill to capture Sloan’s photo-worthy moments.

And Heather captured them perfectly.

We will now cherish these pictures forever. They mark a moment in time that we’ll look back on as a family: honoring my mom, Aaron, and Sloan while also honoring the intensity of what we had all been through the last several years and the love we hold for each other through this experience.

Pictures hold a lot of meaning. Many times the meaning in professional family pictures include joyful moments for families: like the thrill of new marriage or the gentle beauty of a new child. But in our case, these pictures mark a moment in time where our life shifted in very difficult ways: but we were still standing together, honoring our lost loved ones, and rallying around our queen Sloan.

Heather made sure we had those sacred photos and sat with us in the discomfort, grief, love, and heaviness of it all. And the best part? She did it with her own kind, joyful flair – plus a little dark humor to make us laugh as she snapped each photo.

I’m not going to like- I (Heather) wasn’t sure how I was going to connected with Sloan. She couldn’t not see or hear me. Everything I knew to get a Childs photo was thrown out the window. So when Kari got there I just asked her- how do I connect with Sloan? Obviously touch is really important. Kari also brought things Sloan liked- like this fan! She loved the feel on her face.